You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise: you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely…For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:1-3,13,16

Saturday, January 22, 2011


   WARNING---this is a little tongue-in-cheek!
I have decided that instead of water-boarding the terrorists, we could employ a new technique--similar to the process of waiting to become pregnant.  I think you could make anyone go crazy this way! Here's how it would work:
   First, you would tell the person that they will undergo a monthly test--maybe a blood test- where you will be looking for some protein or cell type that they have no control over. Then you tell them if you discover it there will be some type of consequence, like maybe you will cut off their arm or kill their family member. (I am not advocating that---it would never happen, but they don't know that--that's the point--It has to be something that would be important to them).  The next part is the best…you tell them some of the symptoms of what you will be looking for…maybe you will get a pimple on your behind or a wart on your toe or body odor or gas or hardened stool.  I guarantee that whatever it is that you tell them, they will go crazy looking for signs of it. And no matter what it was, they would have at least a few of the symptoms, develop them, or think that they might have them.  Then you actually do the test every month…and then, you make them wait about two weeks to find out the result!  Oh my gosh, every woman on the planet can attest to the fact that it would make a person loony in no time.
    This is what we MWB go through over and over again.  Not only do you have to test monthly, you have to count days, try to pretend to have spontaneous romance on specific days of the month, take pills on other days, some of us have to have shots and surgeries, and then you have to wait to take that monthly test and hope for a result that will change your life.  To all you guys that live with one of us, thanks for dealing with the insanity that results!