You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise: you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely…For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:1-3,13,16

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

God doesn't make mistakes

There is no such thing as a child that is a mistake…God doesn't have accidents and he doesn't make mistakes.  Every child that is born was intended to be a perfect child of God.  There are women everywhere praying to become mothers and there are babies and children everywhere who are desperate for the love of a mother and father. A friend of mine used to say "every kettle has a lid." I believe that God intends every child he creates to have a mother and father and it breaks my heart that because of our fallen sinful world, that doesn't always happen. Every child is a gift from God. Those who don't so easily become pregnant know this so well. Remember this the next time someone tells you that their child was an accident…God doesn't make mistakes.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

ELI Three months

Elijah is 3 months old today (12 weeks). He is becoming much more animated and smiles all the time.  He loves to lie on his back and look at his mobile in his bed or watch toys dangle above him.  He likes to listen to books before bedtime and laughs as if he understands the jokes.  He has found his hands and constantly puts his fingers in his mouth or sucks on the side of his index finger or thumbs.  He is ticklish and curls up when you tickle or stroke his tummy.  He is having much less trouble with gas, although sometimes he has gassy days, he does not act in pain like he used to act. He is sleeping in his own bed at least part of every night.  He goes to sleep well in his own bed and usually will go back down in his own bed after eating during the night as well. I have to say I miss him in my room and sometimes don't bring him back to his bed after nursing him because I want him to stay in our room!  Last weekend we had to attend the funeral of a 10 month old little girl, named Samantha. I won't tell her story but she wasn't supposed to die.  After that, all I have wanted to do is hold Eli and thank the Lord for him constantly.  I just want to hold him and kiss him and soak up all of the baby loving I can while he is little and will still let me kiss him or while he is too small to get away! I keep trying to remind myself of the fact that he is only mine to care for and love, but that I made a promise to God that he would always be His.  I promised to raise him to love the Lord. I plan to be the best example I can be. Eli will be dedicated to the Lord in January and although He has always been the Lord's child, at his dedication I will make that promise public.  He is such a blessing to my life. There is no better thing than seeing the smile on his face. I live for that little toothless grin!
my little reindeer

cute little grin

very serious

sweet smile

silly face

Merry Christmas!

added a little snow to that tiny hi-nee

another funny face (wondering how many more pictures his mommy is going to be taking)

Sweet baby boy! (look at that dimple)

Wednesday, December 7, 2011


I can't believe it's already December!  Eli is officially 10 WEEKS old! First I will tell you about his 2 mo visit to the doctor. He actually went at 9 weeks of age.  He cried with his shots of course but then he was so good.  He just wanted to sleep that night.  In addition to 2 shots in one leg and 1 in the other leg, he also got a painful procedure on his little penis! Yikes.  It's fine now but I just felt so sorry for him with all that torture!  We also talked to her about the gas situation.  She gave us something to try…something I would consider worse than gas…but anyway when he is having bad gas we are supposed to stimulate his little bottom to try to help him go.  It has seemed to help a little but also in general he seems to be better.  I think that since it has been a full 3 weeks now that I have been lactose free all of the milk is out of my system and out of his and that may be helping too.  There is an option to put him on a prescription medicine but the doctor recommended using that as a last resort.  It is used as for stomach cramping in adults so I assume a muscle relaxer.  So as long as he is making progress we won't pursue the rx. I am hoping that like most babies, by four months he will be much better and able to go more smoothly.  He weighed 11 lbs 1 oz (25-50%) and was 24 inches long (50%).

Yesterday was the next big event since he arrived. I had to start back to work.  I am fortunate though, only part-time.  It was very difficult to leave but once I got there I was able to work.  I was happy to return home and I missed having him close to me!  I was able to pump at work and so I will keep my milk supply up.  Eli did well with my mom keeping him.  She fed him two bottles and he ate them with no trouble.  Also he slept well and even took a nap in his bed.  She was nice enough to make us supper also! The worst part of the day was when I was getting ready for work and I kicked Eli's bouncy chair.  The room was dark and I banged into it.  He was in the bed sleeping so I had to be quiet but I fell down to the floor and rolled around for a little while.  I limped around work all day and joked with Neil that it hurt so badly that I couldn't think about missing Eli.  (I really did miss him) My toe is broken, it's the middle toe and it is black and blue but not as painful as it was yesterday.  I will be able to walk a little better tomorrow!

I will be working Tuesdays and Thursdays for December and then I plan to go to three days a week after that. I am hoping that I will be able to stay at 3.  Here's hoping!