You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise: you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely…For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139:1-3,13,16

Monday, November 14, 2011

Getting things done

   Last week and continuing this week, I have been putting emphasis for myself on getting things done around the house: helping with cleaning, dinner, personal hygiene, clipping coupons again, taking care of the dogs, helping with dinner and even starting to work out again.  I am incredibly excited to start working out again, whether it is running or working out with Neil.  That is one thing that we have bonded over whether it is P90x or Insanity, which I am really looking forward to trying, we both do better when we work out together and when we have a goal to work toward.
   Last Friday, I finally got a real bath, including shaving everywhere that needed shaving, not just armpits, washing my hair, and even scrubbing my face with exfoliators.  It was fabulous.  Eli is a good sleeper, but  I was having trouble managing my time.  I would jump in and out of the shower if I had a chance to do that or I would watch him sleep or hold him instead of getting something done.  I am learning to allow him to fall asleep in his bouncy chair or put him in his bed and not hover over him.  It's tough though I just want to kiss every inch of his face every five minutes.  I can't imagine being more in love…(as much as I love my husband--this little guy is still so perfect in my eyes--he is an amazing combination of the both of us) I want to spend every second taking care of him and showering love on him.  But I also know it is important for Neil and I to have couple time and we have been on a few dates, letting my mom keep him for us.  That is helping me to mentally prepare for the big step of going back to work.  I am starting slow-two days a week- but that is overwhelming to me!  It will be helpful in getting back to normal though.
   Yesterday I took the giant step of going through my closet (continuing today) and getting out the maternity clothes for storage and exchanging my summer for winter clothes.  Then I got to try on those winter clothes to determine if I had anything to wear.  The answer was…not much.  The things that fit definitely looked different.  I am not complaining.  Eli was worth every pound and every ounce of sweat it takes me to get back in shape.  I just know my body is a totally unrecognizable to me.  I can't wear the same types of things or sizes I used to.  Some of it is my Dolly Parton boobs, the other seems to be a combination of hips/thighs.  I have always had some body issues--enjoying my pregnancy belly was a learning process but it was so special because of the blessing that was growing inside.  Now there's nothing in there but uterus and fat stores.  Looking in the mirror, I hardly recognize the mom-body that I see.  Some of that is miraculous…the amazing ability to make milk and feed my baby..some people are unable to breast feed and so I feel completely blessed for the abundance of milk. Some is just a product of too much yogurt and expanded hips that had to carry around this peanut.  So I get to shop for some temporary clothes (I hope) to wear for now.
   On the Eli front…the gas had really begun to be a problem, he was in severe pain, shrieking and crying out when he toots and tries to poop.  It was heart-breaking.  It continued despite my giving him milocon, watching my diet, and burping him during feedings.  After calling the doctor's office, I learned I am supposed to give milocon prior to feeding not after or during which is what I was doing. (duh…I am a moron.) Also they encouraged me to do dairy free as well as watch for all of the foods that can cause gas in infants--cabbage, cucumber, peppers, citrus, caffeine, carbonated beverages and pretty much anything that could give me gas or that I am allergic to…whew that doesn't leave a lot.  HOWEVER, when I am SO careful my Eli is a different baby…I made an agreement with myself that I would try their advice through the weekend…Friday was tough, I almost gave up, but then Saturday there was no crying at poop time and no tooting! Sunday was great also. Both nights were 4+ hours of sleep at a time because he wasn't waking up with gas and he slept in the packn' play without crying, putting himself to sleep.  So it is officially worth it!  I am on the most non-productive diet on the planet. It makes my baby happy though so I will do it.  I just have to learn what I am allowed to have and plan my meals better in advance…and hope he grows out of this like most babies who have allergies.  I feel certain it is the milk as I had a little lapse in judgement and ate something that had milk mixed into it…and we experienced a little setback this morning because of it.  I wouldn't have gone down the dairy road except that I have a cousin who had two little ones with milk sensitivities. Both of her kids grew out of it and she did formula with one and nursed the other.  I am committed to nursing but I am definitely going to do my best to find out for sure which foods are to blame through process of elimination or testing if necessary.
   Luckily, he is a great eater despite his discomfort. He has certainly gained weight and is thriving.  This morning he woke up in a great mood and smiled and flirted with me for a few hours.  Here are a few pictures from this week and last.
HUG magnet---yes he is!

Cute little outfit from some church friends! Thank you Millazzos!  He hasn't flown with daddy yet but maybe next year!

Snuggling with mommy 

Cool cat..ready for our morning walk

Stop number two at Cracker Barrel on his first road trip with Lucy and Ethyl.

He looked just like Neil with his expression…or maybe it was the snoring! HA!

Snuggled in tight in his carseat.

Stretching after the long trip.  Loved being held by Great-grandmother Sue

Learning to smile..it's hard to catch on camera

Razorback knit cap from Aunt Courtney…He can't wait to wear it.

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