Potty Runs

Just a little story to illustrate how this week has gone for me(as if the info about the Lowe's trip wasn't enough)! In pregnancy, so I am told, it is common to need to urinate more frequently for a variety of reasons, including increased kidney function and the fact that there is a baby sitting on your bladder! I am a perfect example of this--I now wake several times during the night contrary to my usual easy 10 hours of sleeping without waking.  A few nights ago, I woke up and staggered blindly to the bathroom. I am very near-sighted--I can't see my fingers in front of my face without my contact lenses. I stumbled into the bathroom without turning on the light, lowered my pants, and stooped to sit on the toilet seat, which was not there. My husband, the very same one I have bragged about on this very blog, left the toilet seat raised! Without too many details about how often I clean the toilets at my house, let me just say that they had not been cleaned the night before and even if they had I would still have been totally grossed out by the thought of my naked behind touching any part of the toilet bowl or toilet water.  After I managed to climb out of the bowl and clean my rear end off, some of the most creative methods of retribution entered my mind that I don't think I can even mention.  I was pretty ticked off but I settled for waking up my blissfully unaware snoring groom and describing for him the aforementioned events.  He didn't say a word…well, really, what could he say?…except "Umm, sorry. Are you okay?"  "Yes, hubby, I am fine but your child and I prefer not to go back into the toilet again for a very long time."